Thursday, May 21, 2009


f you go to the SuperCuts on Broad Street, ask for Oz. He will cut your hair real nicely. When you sit down in the chair he will ask, “What will it be?” Now here’s the important part:make sure you say: “I would like an Ozmoto today.”

Now an “Ozmoto” is a haircut of finger length all around the head, except a little bit shorter on the sides and that is it. If it weren’t a little bit shorter on the sides, it would just be a finger length haircut. It wouldn’t be an Ozmoto.

It would be a haircut. But you wouldn’t come to Oz for that. You would come to Oz for an Ozmoto. An Ozmoto is all that Oz cuts. Oz=Ozmoto.

And Oz has been cutting Ozmotos all his life. Back then his mother said, “I think I will name him ‘Oz’ and then she said, “I think, but I am not sure.”

But now as you sit down Oz says, “What will it be?” And you say, “I think I will have an Ozmoto today,” and Oz smiles and is happy his name is Oz and ten minutes later he says, “That will be $8” and you hand him $12 and he says,

“Thank you” and then he says, “Next” and an older gentlemen walks towards the chair as Oz brushes off the residue of yet another Ozmoto from the chair and then carefully, slowly, the gentleman ascends into the chair and as he sits down Oz says, “What will it be today?”

and the old man stops for a moment and pauses and then says, “I just don’t know today–what do you think?” when all eyes turn to Oz and the all eyes turn to the old man and then all eyes turn to Oz and you can barely hear the fire engine outside and the little boy with the Ozmoto

stops crying about his balloon that popped and stares at Oz as everybody stares at Oz and then at the old man and then again at Oz and the room is quiet and Oz’s doesn’t say anything but stands with his scissors in his hands right behind the chair and his hands start to tremble.

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