Sunday, April 12, 2015


I spent the night looking up places to fly to by airplane. I wanted to see how expensive it could be. My God! Buenos Aires is $2000! My God! Palermo is $2200. Good Lord! Hong Kong is $2500! That’s interesting! Paris is only $600 (if you fly from Hong Kong!) Chicago costs nothing! (If you live in Chicago!) I wonder how much it costs to fly to Rome if you live in Rome. I believe they once asked this question in Japan, in the form of a haiku. My Word! Las Vegas is a mere $300! A trifle! I will go to Las Vegas! Why would I go to Las Vegas? Why in the name of all that is holy would I go to Las Vegas?

I have all of these words on my license plate. People are nice to me at the DMV because they know I don’t like to fly.

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