IF YOU REALLY WANT TO BE A GOOD COOK, THE CHEF SAID, WEARING SLIPPERS, DON’T REFER TO YOUR INGREDIENTS AS INCREDIENTS, HE SAID, TAKING OFF

IF YOU REALLY WANT TO BE A GOOD COOK, THE CHEF SAID, WEARING SLIPPERS, DON’T REFER TO YOUR INGREDIENTS AS INCREDIENTS, HE SAID, TAKING OFF HIS SLIPPERS, REFER TO THEM AS YOUR FRIENDS, HE SAID, AND THEN CONTINUED TO DISROBE, EXPOSING HIS FLESHY AND ROTOUND SHAPE EVEN AS HE MADE A VERY GOOD POINT ABOUT FOOD, FRIENDS AND FUN

I have five friends.
Each one of them can be found in the local grocery store in powder form.
They are: China Tung Cinnamon; (actually a type of cassia)
Powdered Cassia Buds;
Powdered Star Anise and Anise Seed;
Ginger Root;
Ground Cloves

They are five fun friends.

As I thought about my friends, I noticed that I capitalized all their names.
That’s because I like them and they are my friends and they are special.

I capitalize anything that is special: Sojourn; Miller Lite; Crab Nebula; Saltine Crackers. But not hatred: unless I am screaming something about hatred. Like: HATRED DRIVES ME CRAZY. Meanwhile, love can whisper, but even when it does, I capitalize it: “Love can whisper” it doesn’t have to even be at the beginning of the sentence: “Whispering? It must be Love”–you name it, you will find it larger than anything else in companion letters.

I didn’t the first time I mentioned it because I was trying to not emphasize it, and also I didn’t want to draw attention to it, so close to hate it was.

Hey! Listen up! Not every grocery store has them, my five friends. I tried a fancy store today and they weren’t there. All is Lost, I said, drawing attention to ‘lost’'–I felt a bee swish past my face. A Bee. You ask and I tell you: that’s because he didn’t sting me.

Intermezzo:

In the movie today, they put the grandfather in the trunk.
In yesterday’s movie, the wax figures murmured unspeakable things.
And then, before that, the stockbroker was ashamed of his father, the boxer.

Act Finale:

Rouge, while merely red in France, pastes the faces of dead people everywhere.

Where are my friends? They will be where I find them. Bon Appetite!

Comments

Popular Posts